The 4 Things I Discovered in Year 2010

2010 was definitely a dramatic year for me. But I've never felt so alive in my life before. The best part was I made great discoveries about life and myself. This could not be achieved if I did not invite Mr. Pain in my life. But now, it was gone, for good.

So, my journey to self discoveries began in 2010, when the world turned to a new decade.

And I am thankful to God for these:

1. I found Work-Life Balance

It feels great to know that I can be efficient in my job without spending too much overtimes at work. Sure, there were demands in my job like getting on teleconferences at night, working on a night shift occasionally and dealing with conflicts. But I have never had a job like my current one, which allows me to have ample personal times. This opens paths to many interesting things in my life now.

Work-life balance has always been something that seemed out of reach for me. But now that I have experienced it, I am truly thankful for it.

The most important thing is I am still competitive, thinking creatively and always finding ways to do better. For that, I think I can get a promotion for my continuous commitment to excellence. The fact is I am still working hard, but mostly to improve myself in a lot of different areas outside of works. But I think these have indirectly helped me in my job too.

In the book “A Class With Drucker: The Lost Lessons of the World's Greatest Management Teacher”, Peter Drucker was mentioned to encourage his students to develop expertise outside their fields to be effective managers.

2. It is good to keep things short and simple

Mark Twain wrote “If I Had More Time I Would Write a Shorter Letter”. I have been struggling for a long time to write and speak more concisely. It has been a quite a challenge, but I had a lot of practices when preparing Toastmaster speeches. I am forced into it, I would say, as I am only allowed to speak on a subject for 6 o 8 minutes, even though I want to cover far and wide.

So, what should I do?

I learn to cut down on a lot of things. I cut down non-essential things, and even sometimes essential things. Because no one can digest all the stuffs I want to throw out at them. So, I have to pick a few essential ones, make my points and make them strong.

Would you prefer slim and tone OR fat-filled content?

3. Silence is my virtue.

One morning when I was visiting a customer in his office, I accidentally SLAMMED my car door with my thumb in between while parking my car. (Yes, I always manage to do weird things to myself). In spite of the excruciating pain, I did not scream. I did not even utter a single word, not even a sigh. I calmly took a tissue out and wrapped it around my bleeding thumb. Blood spurt out fast and my thumb was getting more swollen by the seconds. But I went on to meet the customer. The only time anyone realized about my mishap was when I had to apologize for not being able to shake their hand. It was a funny and painful experience, but it is a solid case on how silent I can be.

If I was not complaining when my thumbs are throbbing and pain is sharp, I do not see any good reason to complain. In his famous book “How to Win Friends & Influence People”, Dale Carnegie shared a great message. “If you want to gather honey, don’t kick over the beehive”, which means don’t criticize, condemn or complain. If you have nothing better to say, zip your mouth shut.

That's why silence can be a virtue. And I prefer to be with people who talk about positive things rather than people who complain all the times.

4. I am so over bad guys.

The world wonders why girls are always attracted to bad guy. I know I did and it is past tense now. Believe me, going what I have gone through, I am so OVER bad guys now.

In one of her interview, Kristen Stewart said one of the reasons why she got hook up with a bad guy is because she had this belief that she might just be the special one who can turn a bad guy into a good one. That is the attraction, albeit a fatal one. It turned out she could not (as expected) and so she suffered the consequences. Her view is so right at the point. I think she has learned her lesson. Looks at whom she is with now? Robert Pattinson, and he is the good guy type. (Yes, my Edward Cullen in Twilight world. LOL)

In another example:

In the TV series “Vampire Diaries”, two brothers fall for the same girl (Elena). There is the good brother (Stefan) and there is a bad brother (Damon). Apparently, in real life, Damon character has much more fans than Stefan’s. Look at this poll – Damon won by 80%! Why is that?

A lot of fans even hope Damon can win over Elena in the battle of affections. From Elena’s point of view, why would she want to hook up with a guy who attempted to kill her brother, just because he was in a bad mood and was provoked? (In fact, Damon did kill Elena’s brother, just that there was some super natural thingy that brought him back to life.).

Yes, Damon is sexy and fun, but Elena should not end up with him. No way! Stefan is loving, caring, respectful, kind, honest, committed and always there to support her. That is a long list of great virtues. And it is time good guys rule over bad guys, cause the latter are so outdated these days.

Alright, at least for me.