Three most touching movies that I watched (and rewatched) in 2008

This may seems a little bit late to be nostalgic about 2008. But by chance, I happened to see 3 old but inspiring movies that I might otherwise missed, if not for the best of fate - definitely must-see movies!

There is one common theme about all the three movies - the realm of possibilities. They tell us about people who achieve things that may at many times seems impossible to them and everybody else. They are not scared to try every ways to make their dreams come true. They do not give up when things are at their very worst.

And these are the most remarkable thing in life - the simple love, the faith ,the pursuit of happiness and changing the world by helping others.

Movie 1: I Am Sam (2001)



Movie 2: Pursuit of Happyness (2006)



Movie 3: Pay It Forward (2000)





Let us be Passionate about Life cause Life is ever so Beautiful!

He's Just Not That Into You

I can’t wait to see this movie. After all, I have literally lived that kind of life for more than 6 years in my past relationship, trying to figure out what were wrong in our relationship, when the answer is so obvious. It was my first relationship, anyway, so I did not know any better. I wish I had known earlier.



I start to read the book too. It makes me wonder why women can be so dumb sometimes. Unfortunately that includes me!

I think this is a very good education book for women. So, I would like to share the catching introduction here.

Introduction by Liz

It started out just like any other day. We were all working in the writers’ room of Sex and the City, talking, pitching ideas, our personal love lives weaving in and out of the fictional lives we were creating in the room. And just like on any other day, one of the women on staff asked for feedback on a the behavior of a man whom she liked. He was giving her mixed messages—she was confused. We were happy to pitch in and pick apart all the signs and signals of his actions. And just like on any other day, after much analysis and debate, we concluded that she was fabulous, he must be scared, he’s never met a woman as great as her, he is intimidated, and she should just give him time. But on this day, we had a male consultant in the room—someone who comes in a couple of times a week to give feedback on story lines and gives a great straight-male perspective: Greg Behrendt. On this day, Greg listened intently to the story and our reactions, and then said to the woman in question, “Listen, it sounds like he’s just not
that into you.”

We were shocked, appalled, amused, horrified, and above all, intrigued. We sensed immediately that this man might be speaking the truth. A truth that we, in our combined hundred years of dating experience, had never considered, and definitely never considered saying out loud. “Okay, he might have a point,” we reluctantly agreed. “But Greg couldn’t possibly understand my very busy and complicated possible future husband.” Soon we went around the room, Greg, the all-knowing Buddha, listening to story after mixed-message story. We had excuses for all these men, from broken dialing fingers to difficult childhoods. In the end, one by one, they were shot down by Greg’s powerful silver bullet. Greg made us see, after an enormous amount of effort, that if a (sane) guy really likes you, there ain’t nothing that’s
going to get in his way. And if he’s not sane, why would you want him? He could back it up too: He had years of playing the field, being the bad boy, being the good boy, and then finally falling in love and marrying a really fantastic woman.

A collective epiphany burst forth in the room, and for me in particular. All these years I’d been
complaining about men and their mixed messages; now I saw they weren’t mixed messages at all. I was the one that was mixed up. Because the fact was, these men had simply not been that into me. Now, at first glance it seems that this should have been demoralizing to us, it should have sent us all into a tailspin. Yet the opposite was true. Knowledge is power, and more importantly, knowledge saves us time. I realized that from that day forward I would be spared hours and hours of waiting by the phone, hours and hours of obsessing with my girlfriends, hours and hours of just hoping his mixed messages really meant “I’m in love with you and want to be with you.” Greg reminded us that we were all beautiful, smart, funny women, and we shouldn’t be wasting our time figuring out why a guy isn’t calling us. As Greg put it, we shouldn’t waste the pretty.

It’s hard. We’re taught that in life, we should try to look on the bright side, to be optimistic. Not in this case. In this case, look on the dark side. Assume rejection first. Assume you’re the rule, not the exception. It’s intoxicatingly liberating. But we also know it’s not an easy concept. Because this is what we do: We go out with someone, we get excited about them, and then they do something that mildly disappoints us. Then they keep doing a lot more things that disappoint us. Then we go into hyper-excuse mode for weeks or possibly months, because the last thing we want to think is that this great man that we are so excited about is in the process of turning into a creep. We try to come up with some explanation for why they’re behaving that way, any explanation, no matter how ridiculous, than the one explanation that’s the truth: He’s just not that into me.

That’s why we’ve included questions from women taken from real situations. They represent the basic excuses we all use that keep us in situations far longer than we should be. So read, enjoy, and hopefully learn from other women’s confusion. And above all, if the guy you’re dating doesn’t seem to be completely into you, or you feel the need to start “figuring him out,” please consider the glorious thought that he might just not be that into you. And then free yourself to go find the one that is.

Introduction by Greg

So I’m sitting in the writers’ room at Sex and the City pondering my good fortune to be the only straight male on the predominantly female writing staff (actually I’m just eating a cookie), when the writers begin talking about guys they’re seeing. This is a common occurrence, as it is part of the writing process for a show that explores romantic relationships. It is endlessly fascinating. I know that sounds sarcastic, but I’m being for real.

So on this particular day, one of the ladies pipes up with, “Greg, you’re a guy.” She is very observant, this one, for I am indeed a guy. Then she says, “So I’ve been seeing this guy…. Well, I think I have.” I know the answer. “See, we went to a movie and it was great. I mean he didn’t hold my hand, but that’s cool. I don’t like to hold hands.” Still know the answer. “But afterward he kissed me in the parking lot. So I asked if he wanted to come over, but he had a really important meeting in the morning so he didn’t come over.” C’mon. Are you kidding me? Know it!

So I asked, “Have you heard from him?”

“Well, that’s the thing. This was like a week ago”—now you should know the answer—“and then today he e-mails me and is like, ‘Why haven’t I heard from you?’ ”

I stared at her for a moment while the answer was bursting out of my eyeballs. (Oh, ladies, you make me so mad sometimes!) Here is this beautiful, talented, super-smart girl, who is a writer on an awardwinning TV show, a show known for its incisive observations about men, who you would think could have her pick of just about any dude around. This superstar of a woman is confused about a situation that to me is so clear. Actually, confused is the wrong word, because she’s too smart for that. She’s hopeful, not confused. But the situation is hopeless, so I broke the news to her: “He’s just not that into you.”

And let me tell you, that’s the good news, because wasting time with the wrong person is just time wasted. And when you do move on and find your right person, believe me, you’re not going to wish you had gotten to spend more time with Stinky the Time-Waster or Freddy Can’t-Remember-to-Call.

Look, I am not a doctor, neither real nor imagined. But I am an expert that should be listened to because of one very important thing: I’m a guy—a guy that has had his fair share of relationships and is willing to come clean about his behavior in them. Because I’m a guy, I know how a guy thinks, feels, and acts, and it’s my responsibility to tell you who we really are. I’m tired of seeing great women in bullshit relationships.

When a guy is into you, he let’s you know it. He calls, he shows up, he wants to meet your friends, he can’t keep his eyes or hands off of you, and when it’s time to have sex, he’s more than overjoyed to oblige. I don’t care if he’s starting his new job as the president of the United States the next morning at 0400 (that’s 4 A.M. ladies!). He’s coming up!

Men are not complicated, although we’d like you to think we are, as in “Things are really crazy right now. I’ve just got a ton of shit going on.” We are driven by sex, although we’d like to pretend otherwise: “What? No, I was totally listening.” And sadly (and most embarrassingly), we would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, “You’re not the one.” We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both—or even worse, cry and yell at us. We are pathetic. But the fact remains, even though we may not be saying it we are absolutely showing you all the time. If a dude isn’t calling you when he says he will, or making sure you know that he’s dating you, then you already have your answer. Stop
making excuses for him, his actions are screaming the truth: He’s just not that into you.

Move on, sister! Cut your losses and don’t waste your time. Why stay in some weird dating limbo when you can move on to what will surely be better territory? Don’t want to hear it? Fine. Here’s the answer you’re looking for: “Hang in there, baby. He’s not the loser everybody’s telling you he is. If you wait and keep your mouth shut and call at exactly the right time and anticipate his moods and have no expectations about communication or your own sexual needs, you can have him!” But please don’t be surprised when he dumps you or continues to drag you through a completely unsatisfying relationship.

We’ve heard it and you’re sick of it. That’s probably why you’re in possession of this book now. You know you deserve to have a great relationship. We agree. So grab a highlighter and get started. Liz told you I was going to say it: Don’t waste the pretty!

When we get more from the household appliance than we expect

Jeff and I bought a thermal pot few weeks ago. So now, we can make our instant coffee, Milo, and tea very quickly without the hassle of filling the water into the kettle, boiling it and waiting for it to get boiled. And we can drink warm water instead of room-temperature water anytime of the day. I think it is an excellent product, a great innovation from kettle and thermos.

I gather it would save me at least 1 minute each day for making one hot drink a day. So, if I live for 40 years more from now, it would save me a total of 10 days. 10 days is astoundingly small compared to number of days I spend on doing nothing but daydreaming all these years. But the most worthy thing is that, in 40 years, it saves millions of my brain cell from having to remember to make my drinks after the water is boiled. In result, I can use the same brain cells for other things and save me a lot of headache. Maybe this theory is as laughable as the myth that human only use 10% of our brains – a theory started in eighties and have many people believed that they can still function if 90% of their brains are removed, so to speak.

There is another interesting theory too – that is regarding WHEN to refill the thermal pot. Let’s explore it based on a conversation between Jeff and me.

J: Why am I always the one who refill the thermal pot?

S: Because you always manage to do it before I do.

J: Why don’t you do it before me then?

S: Because you always refill it before it is less than half the water. And I want to wait until it almost reaches the minimum level for refill. I gather it will save more electricity that way.

J: Say you wait until the water level almost reaches the minimum. Then, you start pouring out the water until it is below the minimum. And you are blithely unaware of it and you forget to refill. How’s that?

S: (Silence…. Sigh! I can’t argue that since I have bad track records of forgetting things.)

J: What if our kids next time pour water from the pot. You expect them to refill each time it reaches below minimum?

S: (Still silence…..Since we do not have kids right now and we still have to wait 5 to 7 years before they can start using the thermal pot, nevertheless, this is a undeniable point – when it comes to safety of children)

J: Why do you always have to wait for things to reach its critical point, then only you want to react? Then, if you miss it, troubles come. Isn’t it you blog about sense of urgency a while ago?

S: Yeah, I did. 2 posts actually (Sense of urgency – Critical Asset in Life and Human Crime Today). I guess it is because I am a procrastinator. It is like a curse or something – keep me from doing right things sometimes.

J: You want to use that as an excuse to fail in life?

S: (Short silence - then) No.

J: There, you get me!

This is not actually the exact conversation because most of the expressions in regards to the sense of urgency happened several times to other topic of discussions. Nevertheless, since last week, I have refilled the thermal pot more than 3 times. The water levels never get below half of the pot.

I do not know why I want to blog this. But then, since I deal a lot with household stuffs when I have become the home-based consultant, I guess it is naturally a big part of my life that I need to talk about. Even my old classmates ask me teasingly every times they see me- so, what food/dish have you learn to cook nowadays?

TEAM - Are you a hare, owl, turtle or squirrel?

I just picked up The One Minute Millionaire by Mark Victor Hansen and Robert G. Allen and found it to be very enlightening.

I like the "Multiple Streams of Income" and "Together Everyone Accomplishes Miracles - TEAM" concept.

For team concept, to create wealth - one must first build a diverse team as success is not a solo project. The diverse team consisted of four different categories of workers, known as the Hares, the Owls, the Tortoise, and the Squirrels. Each one has own strengths to leverage on to make the team successful.

Hare - Creative Types, but bad at follow-through.
Owls - Planners and go-getters.
Turtles - Cautious Types who point out issues.
Squirrels - Details oriented person who get the job done.

The one-minute millionaire site offer a survey to determine which type of worker you are. I found out to be a Hare, which I had guessed right. Here is the link to take the survey:

http://www.oneminutemillionaire.com/tools/hots.asp

Below are the explanations of the roles of Hare, Squirrel and Hare/Owl (a combination of role). If you have result of Owl or Tortoise or other combination, maybe you can post it here in the comment section. It is interesting to know more about the other types of people that we have to work with, and most importantly since we all have to deal with each differences and also improve ourselves. For e.g. I learn that I need to be more detailed like a Squirrel, plan more like an Owl and be able to anticipate problems like a Tortoise.

A Hare Role

APPROACH: Conceptual/Spontaneous

DESCRIPTION: The Hare generates the concepts and ideas. They like to reframe the problem and look for solutions that may be unusual, unique,and/or outside the boundaries of traditional thought. Hares are good at exploring alternatives and perceiving the "big picture".
Hares want freedom from constraint, and when a rule exists they may break it. They may act impulsively, letting their feelings guide them. They derive satisfaction from the process of creating,discussing concepts and ideas,and overcoming obstacles.
When everything is in its place,the Hare may become restless,get impatient,and have a tendency to move from one subject to another.

CONTRIBUTION: Fresh, original concepts that go beyond the obvious,and are not constrained by fear of failure.

WEAKNESESS: Because the Hare enjoys generating ideas, they may move from one idea to another without stopping to evaluate the consequences.
If left alone to refine concepts, they will solve the problem within the problem within the problem, and eventually lose sight of the objective.

INSTINCT: Reframing problems to achieve breakthrough solutions, moving in new directions, examining possibilities without regard to risk.

A Squirrel Role

APPROACH: Methodical/Practical

DESCRIPTION: The Squirrel, more interested in protecting the system than being in the meeting, follows-up on team objectives, and implements ideas and solutions. They focus on ensuring the implementation process runs in an orderly manner, and achieving high quality outcomes.
Squirrels prefer proven, familiar ideas over the novel and untried. They pay attention to details, and see that plans follow an orderly process.
The Squirrel is comfortable being methodical. They tend to be cautious in trying out a new approach, and prefer to think things over carefully before acting.

CONTRIBUTION: The details. Spotting easily overlooked problems before they occur, and minimizing inefficiencies and errors during implementation.

WEAKNESESS: If working without clear and focused objectives or guidelines, the Squirrel may lose sight of the goal and pursue irrelevant strategies.

INSTINCT: To finish what they start,and do things right.

A Hare/Owl Role

APPROACH: Conceptual/Spontaneous/Practical

DESCRIPTION: The Hare/Owl is an idea generator who is also a true entrepreneur. They are good at exploring alternatives and concepts, and they are also more comfortable with an insightful plan. The Hare/Owl is able to generate ideas and develop a plan, based on past experience, to promote those ideas successfully.
The Hare/Owl derives satisfaction from identifying good ideas and developing solutions and strategies to overcome obstacles to implementation. They enjoy working on multiple tasks and like to be involved with the creation and advancement of ideas.
When everything is in its place, the Hare/Owl may get impatient, ready for the next challenge.

CONTRIBUTION: Development of new concepts and ideas that can be advanced within a known process or structure.

WEAKNESESS: The Hare/Owl may become frustrated with the details of an orderly implementation plan, and may pay little attention to the danger signs and barriers associated with implementation.

INSTINCT: Creating new ideas and advancing them in pursuit of team objectives.

No Result for Tortoise and Owl. Please post it if you have.






There are other types of personality test if you are interested. One of them is Meyer-Briggs personality test.

Are you and your partner Auditory, Visual or Kinesthetic?

While I was reading to improve on my communication, I learn that I need to recognize which senses other people rely on to experience the world and then I need to use this information to deal with them.

It seems like people can be categorized into 3 types, depending on how they filter their world by their senses. They can be:

1) Visual – They see the world; inspired by what they see externally, or internally in their eyes as an image or a vision.

2) Auditory – They hear the world; inspired by something they hear either externally or emanating from that little voice inside.

3) Kinesthetic – They feel the world; inspired by something they feel or touch.

Usually, combinations of these 3 senses are used, but for each people, one of these tends to dominate the other two. If we want to relate better to people, win their hearts, impress them or just to make them understand us more, recognizing Visual, Auditory and Kinesthetic people based on their primary senses and communicating to them on their wavelength can be very invaluable.

As with every couple, Jeffrey and I have our fair shares of miscommunications and misunderstanding. So, when I read about the 3 different senses, I went “Wow !! This can be a lifesaver”. Lo and behold, I am Visual while Jeffrey is Auditory. To make it clear to you, these are how we usually communicate:

Jeffrey:
Listen to me.
You are not listening.
I do not hear you.
What I am saying is ….
I like to play my music loud.
You need to speak up. I cannot hear you.
Anything you want to say to me?

Me:
I do not see what you mean.
I cannot picture that.
I like daydreaming.
You need to write that down for me.
I print that out for you to read.

Isn’t it obvious? Mind you, it is not until I understand about the 3 types of senses and how these sensory preferences impact our day-to-day communication. When Jeffrey asked me “Can you hear what I said?”; the truth is I cannot, at least not at the beginning. It is because since it is auditory, my brain has to take the extra step to translate his language into something I can relate to. If he say “Do you see what I mean?”, it will register immediately.

Conversely, I usually say “I am trying to see that” when he is talking to me and sometimes I look away from him because I am trying to picture the things he is saying in my head or I am trying to refer to the materials on screen/printed materials that he is talking about. I bet he thinks I am rude because I am looking away when he is talking or looking distantly (when I am trying to picture things in my head, my eyes will sort of look up and away from the speaker). The fact is I am just opposite from him in our primary senses. But I know now that if I want to connect directly to his sensibilities, I should say “I am listening.” Or “I hear what you said.”

These seem so simple to apply, yet extraordinarily effective. Try it on your partner. A quick tip:

Visuals usually talk very fast.
Kinesthetics tend to talk slowly.
Auditories fall somewhere in between.

So, Jeffrey and I are opposite each other in our chart, because we are both secondary in kinesthetic as we tell how we feel about things, but auditory is last on my senses while visual is last on his. It is also important that we bond in the middle; the kinesthetic; that always get us through the rough times and add sparkle to the good times. So, we can really understand each other when we discuss on we feel about things in our life. The good news for us is that in one of the research, relationships that have endured more than 20 years have sensory preferences that are complete opposite.

I guess that is why people always say “The opposite attracts”.

Sense of urgency - a critical asset in career and life

On the fateful day of 25 January 1990, Avianca Flight 52 crashed into Long Island, New York after ran out of fuel, killing 73 of the 158 people on board. The plane was put on hold from landing by Air Traffic Control several times on its way to New York due to bad weather. After on hold for more than one and a half hour, the crew asked for "priority" landing, which at their critical level of fuel shortage, they should have declared an emergency. The delays, a failed landing attempt at the about 10 minutes from the crash, and communication failure between the crew and air traffic controllers; all these caused the disaster where we all have so much to learn from.

The Avianca Flight 52 is a story of catastrophic result due to poor sense of urgency. There are several things we would find ourselves asking:

Why the crew failed to use the word "fuel emergency" to declare the extreme seriousness of their situation instead of asking for "priority landing"?

Shouldn't the sound of fear and urgency in the pilot and co-pilot's voices have been enough to show to the air controllers they are facing an emergency despite the culture and language barriers, had it been there?

Shouldn't the crew be more forceful and insist on being given immediate landing when they were redirected elsewhere, such as using some forceful words like "NOW" and "We can NO LONGER WAIT"?

A true sense of urgency is an exceptionally important asset for one to become successful in career and life. A true sense of urgency is not about being impatient on everything; it is not about rushing around energetically, running from meeting to meeting and screaming at people to execute. No; that is a false sense of urgency.

True urgency, according to John Kotter, a famous author, focuses on critical issues, which is needed now, not eventually, not when it fits easily into a schedule. True urgency is driven by a deep determination to win, not anxiety about losing. Now means making real progress every single day, not leaving ourselves with a heart-attack-producing task of running one thousand miles in the last week of the race.

With an attitude of true urgency, you try to accomplish something important each day, never leaving yourself with a heart-attack-producing task of running one thousand miles in the last week of the race. Critically important means challenges that are central to success or survival, winning or losing. A sense of urgency is not an attitude that I must have the project team meeting today, but that the meeting must accomplish something important today.

I still have a lot to learn on having a real sense of urgency, because I have always been a procrastinator on a lot of things. But slowly, I am improving; starting by doing the right thing and planning ahead. (Actually, to be honest, it is largely driven by working with a bunch of people with super sense of urgency. Haha....Ahem....).

In my previous blog post, I also mentioned that the lack of urgency caused an innocent girl to die of abuse because no one responded to the situations before it got critical. In Avianca Flight 52, it caused the death of 73 people. Although, not all things are matters of life and death, but I am sure we have a lot of things to learn from the past disasters caused by simple lack of urgency.

A week ago, I was absent from a special occasion; a wedding dinner of a wonderful couple, whom I personally get to know both of them really well. Earlier in the week, I made plan to work with my co-worker (also my partner) on the same weekend as the wedding dinner. My co-worker was working with me on part-time basis so the only available full days for us to work together is only during weekends and holidays. I had casually suggested to her that we need to work on certain outstanding issues, which seems quite important but not so urgent. She said she was busy but she might be free on coming weekend. I thought to myself then "I have a wedding dinner to attend on the same weekend" , but I did not say anything about that to her. Few days later, she confirmed she can meet on the weekend.

I know it will be marvelous for us we work together full day on the weekend because we can really make good progress with one whole day without interruptions. Unfortunately, this also means I could not go to the wedding dinner. So, I made a choice; to work on something that are important to me but relatively not so urgent; not because I have to but because I want to make good better progress in my work and maybe have the rest of following week free to do other things.! In fact, on that day, we worked from 1 p.m. until 6 a.m. the next day, on something that was totally not urgent! But we really did achieve something important because we have completed what we set up to do, and we are satisfied to know that we might be able to use our new-found knowledge anytime in the future.

So, if anyone of my friends ask me now or in the future why I do not show up at certain occasions, my general answer will be:
There are always a lot of choices we can make in our life. It is up to individuals to evaluate the priority and urgency of any of their choices. Since I want to be a business owner, having a sense of urgency in my work is very critical now.

I believe a sense of urgency is more than making the right choices, it has to be synchronized with our thoughts, feelings and actions; our attitude altogether. It should not only be used in work, but also in our everyday life. It is not rushing through things like I used to do last time; it is doing important things NOW instead of LATER.

Human Crime Today

I watched a quite disturbing movie last week that left me pondering on a lot of things about life. The reason why the movie is disturbing is because it is based on a true story and it shockingly reveals how cruel and uncaring people can be. Unlike most of the true stories with inspiring theme, this one does not have a happy ending; and the good does not always triumph over the evil.

The movie is called “An American Crime”. It is about an innocent teenage girl, named Sylvia Likens, who was tortured violently to death by a group of abusers. The abuse, triggered by a struggling woman with health problem and huge stress of taking care of seven children with virtually no money, eventually joined by her children and a whole neighborhood of youngsters.

Though Ginia said in her very excellent review on the movie, that the victim had the bad luck to grow up in a time and a place where “ignorance was understood as its own brand of wisdom”; somehow I feel, ironically, that statement still applies today. Thus, the title of this post is "Human Crime Today".

With a close examination, we can see the same things happening in societies today, although largely with less severity than brutally torturing a girl.

IGNORANT. AFRAID TO DO WHAT OTHERS CONSIDERED AS UNCONVENTIONAL OR NOT COURTEOUS.

The neighbors did not take any actions when they heard heart-wrenching screams on many occasions. They choose to ignore so they do not have any troubles.

Sylvia’s father did not bother to check out the condition of house where he was going to put his two daughters to live there. He was afraid to be prying even though this will concern his daughters’ safety and comfort! If he had, he would have found that the household had no stove, only three spoons in the kitchen drawers and there were fewer beds than were needed for those already living there. And, how he could completely trust a woman he had just known for a day to take care of his daughters is beyond understanding.

FOLLOW THE CROWD. FOLLOW THE AUTHORITY.

The children followed what their parent do or ask them to do without thinking whether the actions are right.

The neighborhood youngsters joined the crowd to torture Sylvia and decided since everyone was torturing and hating her, she must have done something really bad to deserve this. No one question what Sylvia had really done; whether she deserved these; whether the accusations upon her were all true.

Even Sylvia’s sister was forced to follow the crowd so that she would not be receiving the same condemnation or injustice done to Sylvia.

WAIT AND SEE. DON’T RESPOND TO THE SITUATIONS UNTIL IT BECOMES CRITICAL.

Sylvia and her sister had not done enough to stop the abuse, for e.g. by making police report.
In fact, when probing into the inaction on Sylvia’s part, investigators were wondering whether Sylvia is masochist. But they arrived at the conclusion that Sylvia was too young to know what was done to her was incorrect. After all, how could an adult and bunch of kids be so wrong?

Maybe Sylvia and her sister were waiting for the time when the abusers would have mercy and stop the torturing. In fact, in many occasions, it seemed the torture would end and Sylvia was given back the normal treatment. But very soon, the Sylvia would somehow engage the wrath of her’s abusers and the tortures started again. Some evil people just would not change.

DON’T THINK OF THE CONSEQUENCES OF OUR ACTIONS.

It seems like the abusers never anticipated Sylvia would die from all the tortures and inhuman treatment done to her.

Neither did they think they would go to jail for that and that would all change their life enormously.

IT IS NOT URGENT TO SOLVE THE PROBLEMS (ACTIVE). MAYBE IF WE DO NOTHING, IT WILL GO AWAY (PASSIVE).

Somehow, until the Sylvia’s death, no one had done anything to help her in time; else; fate would be reversed. In one part of the scenes in “An American Crime” (WARNING, some spoiler here.), the director wanted us to believe there would be a happy ending if someone would have done the right thing then. We hope very much that was what happened.

But the neighbors, the children or the youngsters, the parents of the youngsters, Sylvia’s family and even the reverend, and more countless people; all failed to do the right things on time to save her. When they found Sylvia was dead, then only the youngsters tried to resuscitate her, called the police and the sister finally revealed the whole story to the police.

....................................................................................................................................................................

A lot of people mourn Sylvia after so long, especially when "An American Crime" shows the world, some parts of how it happened.

I guess the compassion and sadness are also due to the fact that most of us experience or see something similar in the world where we live in (most probably in smaller scale); not just the injustice, but also the rest of the people that do nothing to help. Indeed, human crime today in that part is very abundant.