Heartbroken friend

I cannot believe it -my best friend just told me that her boyfriend had broken up with her. Through email.

How come? I asked. He was almost the ideal boyfriend. Everything he had done for my friend just show how caring he was and how deeply he loved her.

She was not caring enough. That was what he told my friend. In the email and later in the Google chat.
For 5 years, he has invested his love and suddenly out of nowhere he wanted to give up? Yes, my friend had been a little slow in growing her care for him. But she has improved a lot over times and she is those type of person which only care for certain people she feels safe with.

And she had care a lot about this guy. She had endured the long distance relationship for 5 long years, diving into her works as an excuse to escape her loneliness. She had stayed loyal despite the temptation. She was already prepared to married to him. How come he decided to give up even without warning her. How come he did not want to discuss with her first before he decide? What happened to him to cause him to make the sudden decision?

My friend is of course very devastated. I did not know what I can do for her. I am waiting for her call as she was out now with her friend. I still remembered the last time she was heartbroken (around 6 years ago) , we went to Genting and I taught her how to gamble on the horse racing machine in the casino. I think I may go to Genting again with her if she wants. At least we can escape to some place.

How come when one grow up , relationship becomes more fragile? People do not just go ALL out and love the other half anymore. There are always insecurity, calculations , materialism. No one dare to mention "forever" anymore. And there will be "no guarantee" what will happen to us.

Recently I met up with some old friends. One had just broke off with his girlfriend recently and was very down and not seeing friends for a long time. (Luckily he recovered) . One just got through the pain of divorce. The rest, either are not secured or prepared to get married or questioned how one can trust her partner?

I can see the pain and insecurities in a lot of people. They said they have learned from their mistakes. But, I also saw that it will be harder for them to accept new love and they will thread ever so carefully.

At this moment, I feel I really get older and have gone into another stage in life.

The first stage waas when we grew from toddler to a child who started to go to school.

The second stage was when one stop school and started to go to college or universities. Or continued Form 6 in the government schools.

The third stage was when one stop education and started going out to work.

The fourth stage is when one have enough experience in work + life and need to settle down or find real purpose in their life, usually by giving up or letting go of something.